Anxiety and Depression : Let's Talk About It

Let me be completely honest, I’m depressed And no, I don’t need some wild or dramatic intervention. No, I have not been curled up in the bed. No, I have not been crying or binge drinking or partaking in erratic self-destructive behavior. I’m just depressed but it will pass and letting others know that how they feel is normal and educating on the dynamic faces of depression helps.

If you follow me on social media or have known me longer than a few years, you may know that I have a relationship with depression and anxiety. They come, they go, they linger in the background, and sometimes they scream in my face.

Lately, they’ve been manifesting behind the thoughtful action of helping others (anxiety via escapism), my lack of patience for anyone, and almost 3 weeks of insomnia finally coming to ahead. Two nights ago, I was just in a rage, feeling a surge of anxious energy and not knowing what to do with it which causes me to feel infinitely frustrated.

Despite all of this, I still go to work. I still exchange pleasantries and smile and hug and laugh with my friends. I still dance and speak to my family and problem solve. I still make the necessary calls to move my life forward.

I still show up for myself because I understand that it’s all a part of my personal balance. When the mood passes, I don’t want a huge mess to clean up so I pay attention to my triggers and finds constructive ways to express myself. If I’m completely honest, I’m probably frustrated while I show up for myself but I realize how addressing this part of myself makes me more likely to succeed.

Depression and anxiety doesn’t make me any less of a boss. It makes me a better boss because it forces me to explicitly communicate when things seem overwhelming. It helps me to set boundaries, accept other’s boundaries, and brainstorm alternative ways to solve problems. And although it’s annoying and inconvenient, it makes me, me. I give myself love, understanding, and an extra dose of patience during this time and I hope if you find yourself feeling this way, you will too.

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P.S. With Therapy And True Inner Work (It Ain’t Pretty) It Gets Easier.